Last 5 minutes of the day:

Student: My dad is in Paris fighting in the war. But he's not dead. And my mommy is marrying my Uncle Bill.

Where do I live again? The deep south? Someone tell me what war is going on in Paris? Is someone fighting over a croissant in a cafe somewhere? Is it legal to marry your brother?

The sweet gullible minds of children. Darling girl, your daddy is in jail (in the south coincidentally, where perhaps there is a war: who will be dipping whose "baguette" in whose "coffee...") and has left your family. Keep believing that. He is still your hero, but someday you will know the truth. And your mom is not really marrying an uncle...why did she get you to call him "uncle" ... it just makes things sound a bit creepy later on don't you think?

That is all today.