Tag that ass!

Tagged by Mackey!!
She know's I'll play and she also seems to think that sweet innocent me has some deep, dark (and somewhat kinky) secrets to share. Jeepers! I hope I don't dissapoint!

My earliest memory is...having my favourite doll chained to the table leg by my older brother and watching him beat her senseless. My mom thought it was histerical. I did not. I killed his hamster.

At school I... was voted most likely to get laid at my grade 13 grad. Brilliant. It was actually more of a contest between this guy and myself. I bet him a nights worth of drinks that I'd win. Seems I was more convincing than he was to get votes...but then again, I have the boobs right? I won. Can't remember if I got laid tho....

My first relationship...weird. We were best friends and decided to try dating out. It was too 'icky'...like kissing my brother, so we split up soon after. Ruined the friendship too. I would go on and do this 2 more times with guy friends. I never learn I guess.

I wish I'd never worn...such a bright coloured shirt the night I was busted for 'public indecency'...the cop probably saw me from a mile away like a beacon in the night...that and my lily white ass of course ;-)

My mother and father always told me... to be good and to listen to my teachers.

I wish I had...children.

I wish I hadn't...Let myself be alone with someone many years ago...

My most humiliating moment was...having the father in law walk in (pre-father in law days of course) while otherwise engaged in something or another. He stood there dumb-founded but continued to have a conversation like nothing happened...at least my youngest brother in law has since taken the cake and this story is no longer told at family dinners!

My happiest moment was... This is really sappy, but I was really happy the first time I graduated Univeristy. To see the look on my mom's face was priceless. I was the first in a long time to graduate university. My wedding day was pretty damn happy too by the way.

At home I cook..in the buff, except when frying something...that hurts too much! This reminds me that I need blinds in the kitchen....

My last meal would be... mom's pasta sauce and some kind of noodle. Or Angelina and Brad sprawled out for me. I'd take either and roll with it.

My favourite gadget is...the one I got at the sex show..lol

I'm very bad at...licking my elbows.

When I was a child I wanted to be... a teacher and an RCMP. 1/2 ain't bad.

It's not fashionable, but I love... my toque! I hate being cold dammit!

Friends (would)say I am...dependable (I hope!), a wise-ass, and maybe they'd say I was a decent friend...ask them!

The song I'd like played at my funeral is...I was going to say something lame like ACDC's Highway to Hell..but knowing my friends, they'd do it. Maybe some U2 -with or without you. Never really thought too much of this.

If only I could...get knocked up? ohhh and my own farm of horses and some super sexy barn boys...mmmm cowboys even. Yummy.

The hardest thing I've ever done was...say goodbye to my Gramma when she passed away.

What I don't find amusing is...deadbeat parents. I can't stand this issue..don't get me started....

If I wasn't me I'd like to be... royalty. I'm already the princess around here..so it's not that big of a step. Riiight. I only wish. I am more of the chamber maid around here!

At the moment I'm watching...my dog lick his ass...I wonder why humans can't do that?

If I were a car I'd be...pink? This is truly a sad answer. Anyone who knows me knows I know a fair bit about cars and such, and would be expecting some dynamite answer, but the truth is I can't decide if I'd be some hot sporty little number or a muscle car...so pink it is!

I often wonder...what it would be like to be male..but just for one day.

Please note: No hamsters were ever harmed. I accidently let one out to play in the backyard once and he got away, but I never directly killed one.